NOTES

TUTORIAL 1 

 

Treatment! A series of events that we write to tell a story  ?

It’s like a visual voice? LOL . *Write what they doing ; not what they thinking* 

Saying the actions ? LOL .

[HAHHAS A NEW THING I LEARN TODAY . wth . LOL]   

 

[Crazy lecturer say some bloody stuff? LOL . ]

 

MEL; moblie E learning 

 

ASSIGNMENTS in this class will use :

– Present tense 

– 3rd person 

– Visual voice 

This three point is like making a character is ‘narrating’ the story as it is happening  . 

          Example : mark picks up the gun and holds it in his hand. it begins to trembles, as if alive . 

       –  Present more immediate and urgent feel to the material . 

 

Commonly used in :

– Screenplays . 

       -Story/film is unfolding as we read.

       -Fosters a more urgent and immediate feel to the story

– Trillers and suspense genres

 

 

Passive VS Active voice 

– Passive voice :

      –  uses weak verbs .

         Example : Don’t use ING in words . Like he is laughing . But use ‘ he laugh loudly’

      –  Tells what’s happening in the character’s head. 

      –  Distances the reader from the story

– Active voice :

     –  Strong action verbs 

     –  Hows the action

     –  Uses an immediate sentence structure

     –  Conveys the story in a lively manner 

 

The sky was blue with a lot of fluffy white clouds = Passive voice 

Fluffy white clouds drift like cotton in the ocean blue sky = Active voice 

 

[My english C5 . It’s hard for me okay ? LOL]

 

Mark was angry with jane for tricking him into helping her = Passive voice

Mark slams the door and stalks across the chamber. He shouts : ‘bitch!’ = Active voice 

 

[Hahas leslie say . F-d this shit . ]

[Hahahahs . Leslie say ; f*** you f*** you f*** you shit LOL! He did it for a example . Like fahan with his GF ? ]

[He really does like to swear alot right ? gosh . Later i become like those swearing ppl like carvey ]

[Leslie fav quote is BITCH . LOL]

 

TIPS FOR WRITING :

– Everyone WILL NOT HAVE PROBLEMS  coming up with a list of excuses for procrastination . 

– The BIGGEST PROBLEM is GETTING STARTED .

– If you have a work in progess, NEVER stop for the night if you are stuck . [Cause you will like lost everything the next day =)]

– Always solve the problem and keep going until you are in safer water. A good night’s sleep is important . Sleeping on problems is a myth 

– If you can’t get started on a project , start writing anyway . To do this, you need to have some words to type . 

– it’s doesn’t matter what you write, you’ll soon begin to think and move in your own rhythm / pace . 

– Keep a box of words ; like in the shoebox or whadeverr u like 

[Leslie say : doesn’t mean i’m writing on the board i can’t see you ; my fringy ass got eyes . ] 

[OMG HAHAHAHS ]

 

EXERCISE 1A : OPENERS .

Sometimes ppl use dirty words or shocking phrases to grab ppl attention . 

 

[ Carvey walks into a graveyard wearing nothing but a hula skirt. OMG. He’s like trying to dance a Hawaii dance but suddenly just trip over a stupid skeleton bone. He point his middle finger and kinda shout ‘WHAT THE F*** IS THAT’ and the sound just echo through the whole blankness of the graveyard. He’s doesn’t know what is he doing, I mean he sleepwalk?  The sexy hula skirt are striking colour you cannot imagine, but he likes it -_- somehow or rather? Things wasn’t going too well for him either, he went on with his dance and a friendly ghost name casper pops out of nowhere. He laughs and rolls on the bloody floor like some lunatic people. This is getting so random but it’s a short story. Should not get any longer. Carvey just want to dance in the graveyard! It’s his interest! What should I care?  ]

[I think it’s kind of crap but i still like it . ]

 

– NOTE DOWN QUESTIONS YOU WERE ASKING YOURSELF AS YOU WROTE IT .

       – Whose storoy am i telling ? 

       – What is the point of his story ? 

       – How can i engage the attention of the audience ? 

 

 

 

EXERCISE 1B: OPENERS 

– WRITE 12 OPENING PHRASES in yore blogs under the Openers Page . 

 

TUTORIAL 2

 

From Akmal openers :

After dragging the heavy brown sack for a few hundreds meter , James suddenly stop in his track. Cold sweat start to form on the forehead and he start to look around the surrounding with panic . In front of him was the sea , it was pitch black but the sound of the wave keeps on going . Lots of images keep flashing in his mind , and with all his might he throw the heavy brown sack into the dark blue sea allowing it to sank it to the depth before turning his back to leave …..

 

Elements of dialogue

– DIALOGUE REVEALS CHARACTER.

   – A character will talk about himself and other people will talk about him . 

 

– DIALOGUE ESTABLISHES RELATIONSHIP BETWEEN CHARACTERS 

  – Once you have established your main character’s point of views , you can use dialogue with other characters to show that they have other attitudes, creating opposite/alternative point of views .

   – This helps to create and sustain the element of CONFLICT between characters .  <Need conflict ! No conflict there’s like nth much la>

[ LOL leslie examples are so funny .  A guy buy another guy drink . ANTI SOCIAL GAYS STUFFS . LOL ]

 

-GOOD EFFECTIVE DIALOGUE WILL MOVE THE STORY FORWARD . 

  [Leslie say sometimes saying less is better ]

 

-DIALOGUE COMMUNICATES FACES AND INFORMATION TO THE AUDIENCE 

   – It conveys essential exposition

   – Characters will talk about what happened, establishing the storyline [it’s good and bad . it’s bad as when u talk , then it shows everything ]

 

-DIALOGUE COMMENTS ON THE ACTION 

 

-DIALOGUE TIES THE SCRIPT TOGETHER 

   – It is one of the devices that YOU as a writer can use to expand and enlarge your characters. 

 

[ If you can see it or hear it , don’t write it – neville smith ]

 

– Dialogue should be used sparingly 

– Never tell the audience what they can see for themselves! 

– DIALOGUE IS NO SUBSTITUTE FOR ACTION

 

 

 

 

In hollywood when they look at a page and it’s got too much black, too much ink on the paper , they say ‘ SHIT! IT’S FREEZE THE CAMERA TIME ! ‘

 

– COMMON MISTAKE ! 

   – Students sometimes never achieve a level of competence as they tend to reproduce conventional spoken language, long statements of ” REAL TALKING ” , and defend their decision by telling us that : “IT’S HOW THE CHARACTER SPEAKS”

– GOOD DIALOGUE is not somebody’s ability to write authentic speech as heard in real life. 

– If that was all there is to it, you can just push a button on the tape recorder and then go collect your Oscar 

 

– GOOD DIALOGUE is the illusion of reality .

 

– You’ve got to know how to edit what people say without losing any of the spirit . 

 

[leslie say a chim chim word . GOSH ‘ verbatim’ means word for word  =) ] 

 

– COMMON MISTAKE ! 

   – Students tend to create radio shows with images . << FILM IS A VISUAL MEDIUM >>

 

A SCREENPLAY IS A STORY TOLD IN PICTURES . 

 

EXERCISE : WRITING DIALOGUE 

THE SCENARIO : 

– a middle-ages man returns home from work. 

– he had stopped for a few drinks with his friends and forgot to phone his wife to tell her he’ll be late . 

– the dinner is ruined . 

 

THE EXERCISE : 

– write a short scene composes of dialogue between husband and wife

 

 

 

man : LALAS , super high 

woman : what happen to your damn phone , fall into the drain or you ate it as your dinner -_-

man : why are you being so scarastic ? can’t i have my own life ? 

woman : isn’t dinner your life ? why will i ever cook at the first place man . 

man : OPPS! YOU SHOULD HAVE CALL ME WHAT ……….

woman : what the hell ? you think i’m like a slave of yours or what . why not you just ask your friends to cook for you every night huh . 

man : whadeverr ; you’re my wife what . 

woman : yaya , and you didn’t even want to phone back ? GOSH . go to hell man . 

man : SO NOW WHAT ? 

woman : WHAT , GO DIE MAN .

 

What my dad and my mom will say 

Woman : 几点了! 

Man : 做什么? 

Woman : 我煮饭,你懂吗?去哪里了huh ?

Man : 管这么多做么。

Woman : WA 我不可以管meh .

Man : then你要阵样?

Woman : 我每天要做工lei .

Man : 我不用meh . 

Women : [ kind of went mad and shouting. ]

Man : [ keep laughing and talk crap la ! LOL ]

WE WRITE BEST WHAT WE KNOW WELL . 

STORYTELLING TOOL 1 : OBSERVATION

   – Adopt a KEEN EYE

   – Develop a natural SENSE OF CURIOSITY 

  – An observed event, when subject to simple questions , can set up a sequence of possibilities that will develop into a story worth telling . 

[ there’s always a history behind something ]

 

– whom am i writing about ?

– Who is my character ? 

– What is he/she/it like ?

-What does he/she/it do ? 

What happens to him/her/it in the story ?

 

 

EXCERCISE : AWARENESS LEVEL 

– 2 students

– Back-to-back

– Describe each other ACCURATELY 

 

What we learn : 

– People rarely observe familiar people or things closely

[ bf and gf . 

gf : what is different from me today 

bf : eh eh eh eh eh eh  ; today weather very good hor 

LOL ]

– Most people pass through the day with 20-30% awareness

– MINDLESS OBSERVATION vs TURE OBSERVATION 

  OBSERVE in a conscious way 

– DEVELOP the ability to SEE and RECORD people : 

   -Their MOVEMENTS 

   -Their physical characteristics

   -The setting/places they’re in 

 

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